How is your nervous system feeling today?

Before you read the next line, I invite you to take a brief moment and observe the sensations your body is experiencing right now. What do you notice?

Are you unsure, or did something immediately stand out? Maybe your shoulders are slightly raised. Maybe your breath feels shallow or steady. Maybe there’s a heaviness in your stomach, or a subtle buzz of energy in your chest you didn’t realise was there until you paused.

Whether we’re aware of it or not, our nervous system is constantly shaping how we move through the world. It guides our energy, our emotions, our sense of safety, and our ability to connect with others. 

As we reach the end of the year, a time when routines shift, emotions surface, and expectations pile up, it can be helpful to turn toward the body as a way of reconnecting with ourselves. Instead of thinking about stress in abstract terms, we can ask a gentler question: How is my nervous system doing today? This isn’t a diagnostic question. It’s a relational one—an invitation to deepen your connection to your own internal landscape.

What your nervous system is trying to tell you

Our autonomic nervous system is the part of the body that runs in the background, taking care of things like breathing, heart rate, digestion, and blood pressure without us having to think about it. It has two main branches that work together like a dimmer switch, helping us move between action and rest throughout the day.

One branch is responsible for activation. It’s often called the “fight-or-flight” system, and it gives us the energy and focus we need to get things done, respond to challenges, and stay alert. When this system is working well, we feel motivated and engaged. When it’s working overtime, we might notice anxiety, tension, restlessness, or irritability.

The other branch supports settling and recovery. Sometimes referred to as the “rest-and-digest” system, it helps us slow down, focus, digest food, and feel grounded. When this system is active in a healthy way, we feel calm and connected. When it’s over-engaged, we may feel low on energy, shut down, foggy, or overwhelmed.

Neither state is better than the other—we need both. What matters is being able to notice where our nervous system is at and gently support it back toward balance when we’ve tipped too far in one direction.

A small experiment (you can do it right now)

Take a slow, easy inhale through your nose, then let your exhale be slightly longer than your inhale. You don’t have to force anything—just allow the breath to lengthen on the way out. Two or three cycles of this send a message to your nervous system that things are safe enough to settle. You might notice your shoulders dropping a touch, your jaw releasing, or your thoughts quieting for even a brief moment. These subtle cues matter. They’re the building blocks of regulation, your nervous system’s way of finding centre again.

Regulation doesn’t have to be complicated

Many people imagine that regulating the nervous system requires long meditation practices, dedicated yoga classes, or major lifestyle changes. While those can be helpful, your nervous system actually responds best to small, consistent signals of safety woven throughout the day.

For example, simply looking around the room and noticing colours, shapes, or something pleasant can help your brain shift out of threat mode and into a grounded sense of awareness. Feeling the weight of your feet on the floor or the support of the chair beneath you can bring a surprising amount of steadiness in just a few seconds. Even temperature shifts—running cool water over your hands or holding a warm mug—can prompt your system to recalibrate. Gentle movements like stretching, rolling your shoulders, or taking a short walk help release excess activation, while brief pauses for a single slow breath offer a momentary reset. None of these require perfection or significant effort; they’re simply invitations for your body to settle.

Self-regulation and co-regulation

Although we often talk about calming ourselves down as something we should do independently, humans are wired to regulate through relationship. We co-regulate through eye contact, conversation, shared laughter, supportive presence, or simply being near someone who feels safe to us. If you find it difficult to settle yourself on your own, that isn’t a flaw—it’s biology. Reaching out to a friend whose voice brings steadiness, sitting quietly with a partner or pet, or being in the same room as someone who offers a sense of ease can all help your system find equilibrium.

Regulation doesn’t mean eliminating stress or uncomfortable emotions. Instead, it’s about having enough internal and external support to move through challenges without becoming overwhelmed.

A final invitation

As you finish reading, place one hand somewhere that feels comfortable like your chest, shoulders, or stomach and let your breath move gently beneath your hand. Ask yourself again: How is my nervous system feeling today? There’s no need to change anything in this moment. Simply noticing is an act of care.

And as we step into a new year, may you meet yourself with curiosity rather than pressure, compassion rather than criticism, and a little more room to breathe when you need it most.